Hosting an Au Pair in New York:

Hosting an Au Pair in New York: Childcare You Can (Seriously) Trust Like Family

We all know that choosing childcare is no easy decision. As parents, we want a high-quality solution we can trust that provides flexibility and enrichment. This month, we decided to take a look into a little-known childcare option that h aundreds of thousands of American families have been turning to for the past 30 years: hosting an au pair!

We say “little-known” because many people aren’t exactly sure what an au pair is or does, much less how to find one. An au pair is a young adult between the ages of 18-26 from another country who comes to the U.S. on a J-1 cultural exchange visa and lives with an American family for up to two years. The au pair can provide up to 45 hours per week of childcare while experiencing life as part of an American family.

We recently caught up with Abigail and Patrick MacElroy, parents of twins from Ossining whose family has hosted au pairs for several years, to get an inside look at what it’s like to host an au pair in New York, and why their family chooses the Cultural Care Au Pair program year after year as their childcare option.  

Macaroni Kid: Hey, Abigail and Patrick! Tell us a bit about your family.

Abigail & Patrick: We live in Ossining with our two children, Corinne and Owen, both 7 years old. We’re currently hosting an au pair from Germany for the second year and she’s a wonderful addition to our family.

MK: That’s great. So why did you initially decide to host an au pair, as opposed to other childcare options?

A&P: We initially made our decision to explore the au pair program after working with a nanny for a few years. We’d had a previous relationship with our children’s caregiver, (which made making the switch emotionally challenging) but after weighing the flexibility, reliability and cost of the au pair program, plus the opportunity to learn about a different culture we just thought it was too good of an opportunity to pass up.

MK: Can you share how Cultural Care Au Pair has supported you throughout the process of finding and hosting an au pair?

A&P: We explored a number of au pair organizations, but found that Cultural Care Au Pair offered a combination of size (a larger pool of candidates to choose from), local support and a matching process that addressed our key selection criteria. When we started our search it was important for us to focus on au pairs over the age of 21 who we believe could get the most out of an experience in the NYC area where we live. Additionally, we were looking outside the peak July/August arrival time frame so we were concerned about the number of potential applicants. Our local childcare consultant (LCC) assured us to be patient and not hit the panic button as there would be a significant number of candidates that come available in our window. She was right and it was very reassuring. When the matching process changed in 2018, their matching specialist was really responsive to our questions and we feel that once again, we’ve made a great choice with our next au pair.

MK: We’d love to hear some of your favorite memories about hosting your au pairs...can you share some with us?

A&P: One of our favorite memories centers on the first day of school when our children went into first grade. This was a big day under any circumstance – a new school, the transition from their kindergarten to “a big kid” school and the nerves and excitement level were high. To mark the day, our au pair Annika brought to our family one of the traditions in Germany, called “Schultüte” or “School cone.” Schultüte are given to children in Germany, Austria, and in some other areas of Europe where German is spoken on their first day of first grade. Parents or grandparents will give a large cardboard cone that is decorated and filled with toys, chocolate and candy, school supplies, and other fun items that help make the first day of school a fun day versus something to be nervous about. Our kids LOVED it. It was such a great way to incorporate a piece of Annika’s culture into our lives and made an already special day for us even better.

MK: Do you have any words of wisdom for families who might be thinking about hosting an au pair?

A&P: Don’t wait! We wrestled with our decision for about a year and spent more time focusing on why an au pair wouldn’t work than on the potential positives. Part of that was our relationship with our previous caregiver. Part of it was getting over the idea of having a stranger live in our home. But, once we made the decision we set about trying to develop a clear set of expectations that we could communicate to each other and to the au pair to make it a successful experience for everyone. For example, au pairs are not employees, so you need to set out clear expectations for their duties. Many of the au pairs are living abroad or away from home for the first time, so being clear on the “rules” both with your children and as a roommate are really important.

Learn more about hosting an au pair